Three Weeks To Go

....and of course Oregon had to have amazingly PERFECT weather today! I call my kids and my mom and find out the temperature is a "normal" 104 today. yuck. But, so what. I will have AC in my place and in my car and its in all my friends and families houses! However, I'm hoping it will be the right type of inspiration to get me back onto a healthier eating schedule.
I was doing so well....then grief took over. Followed by shock, anger, and deep depression. This set me back with saying fuck it! I'm eating those chips, and those cookies, and that sandwich, that burger, those fries, ice cream...! Over my head, over the top, I can't seem to do anything in moderation.

I love too much
I miss too much
I scold myself too much
I eat too much

Cycles. I'm in another cycle. Cycles of life. Ups and downs. Right now getting back on track is all I can think of while closing this chapter in my life.

I have 8 more working days at Yahoo!
I have 19 more days before packing the truck
I have 20 more days before driving away from my dream life
I have 21 more days before I see my families faces - and hear them say: Welcome Home

Push on...don't look back without smiling and appreciating what was once so wonderful
We are all imperfect humans making imperfect decisions in an imperfect world
Some of us base our decisions on other people
Some of us get so confused as to where we are telling ourselves we should be
Some of us needs to be kinder to ourselves and carry on, moving ahead looking forward to the adventure that awaits.
This is going to be me! Not only do I deserve to treat myself kind, but I'm worth it. I'm a wonderful and caring woman who only wants to be a support to those I love. I am embraced by so much love of family and friends, constantly reminding me that my life has been not only a blessing to them and to others, but that I will find someone who is ready to share this world with me in an explosive powerful and loving way!

Now, to pack. To say goodbye. To wave to the blue/gray skies above and say:

Thank you Oregon. You were my home. You always will be my home in my heart.
Forever and ever, plus one more day.