One day

I’m reminded many times in just one day why I should no longer be living. I’m told I have no friends and laughed at and told I’m angry and I act like I do nothing wrong and that a few simple short words gets spoken by me in what I think is a normal conversation, but before I realize I must have said it sarcastically or with a tone or whatever......then the punishment begins. I’m in a hell that has no door. Why am I a person who can be picked on or belittled or spoken to do condescending...as if I were a child? Does she know how close the rope is slipping out of my fingers? How fragile my mind is and how I self loathe myself enough for both of us? 4 people stand in my way. How easy that could turn to 2 any day now, so push a little more, drive me over the edge. You can shame me when I’m gone. You can play those videos you threaten to have so the world will see “how I really am”. One day the door will open. Then it will shut. One day.